I was given a chance to watch the premiere screening of "Eternal Sunshine of the Spotless Mind" (No, don't worry... I won't be reviewing the film). The film is about Love, and Losing, and Forgetting, and Finding Love again... Love is a universal thing. We do find a lot of great stories about Love and Loving. Great movies about great love stories, even tragic ones... but as they say, nothing beats a real love story, something that is not out of one's imagination, but out of someone's feelings and recollection.
In the forum that I "moonlight" as a "moderator", people sometimes ask me for advices about their personal problems... love problems. Sometimes I am asked if I am a doctor, or a psychiatrist, or a love guru, or even a sex guru, because they look at me as if I'm an authority when it comes to love and everything that comes with it. I'm thankful and flattered about the way people in that forum treat me. And I used to joke around that maybe they respect my views and opinions simply for the reason that I'm one of the oldest in that forum when it comes to the biological age (which reminded me that I'll be 35 this September). They find my advices educational, mature, and natural, logical, and as one claims, personal... as if every advice that I give is something coming from the heart, as if I feel what they are feeling. I always tell them that I'm just a regular guy who experienced the joy of loving, the pain of losing, the happiness of being in love, and the darkness and pain of grieving... that I'm just like them, and I am one of them.
They would ask me things as simple as "what it feels to be in love" up to the complex "What shall I do, I'm in love with a married guy", or something like "What is the right time to have sex" or "is gay relationships okay". But the most common are questions about letting go, falling in love with the wrong person (or at the wrong time), and the pain of losing someone you love.
This of being an "adviser" is really beyond my profession. I work as a Supervisor in an I.T. office in Makati. And that of being a moderator and adviser is something I never expected. Things happen unexpectedly... We love, we dream and we hope... then everything will stop and will start to crumble down. My love story will be a novel, a series, if I will put it in writing. It has all the elements of a good novel: humor, love, tragedy, drama, suspense, action. Been into a lot of experiences, been into the rollercoaster ride of my life... had my Ups and Downs, experienced the Best and the Worst of my life... but I'm still here... Living, loving, dreaming, hoping...
One thing I learned about love is that it is something you can't control. It's purely emotional. And as T. always tell me, "Emotions for what they are, can't be controlled". It surely takes a lot from us when we are in love.. and requires a lot more, when we have to let go of that love...
Maybe I do understand what people feel when they ask me for advices. I might have been there myself before...
We can't erase the memories of a love gone astray, a life gone awry, the memories of a bad relationship... but we can let go of the pain and the grief that comes with it... it may be hard, but we can always move on...
And going back to the movie, Eternal Sunshine of a Spotless Mind is a brilliant movie... but you have to be in love... experienced being in love, to fully understand it... otherwise, you will look at it as, "just another movie of my time".
